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A cappella Continues to Practice Despite Pleas from Administration to “Shut the Fuck Up”
Last Saturday, the 5th of November, the Office of Campus Life (OCL) released a statement clarifying its stance toward a cappella...
The Haybale
Nov 18, 2020


Friend can't get lunch because "Requests to hang out exceed order capacity"
“What the hell, man?” stated Joseph Garcia ‘22 on Monday, after his friend, Cody Lee ‘21, declined to get lunch, citing “Requests to hang...
Max Stein
Nov 18, 2020


Op-Ed: My Tutorial Partner is Clearly Trying to Instigate a Threesome With Me and Our Professor
It was our second class together when I first realized it. Maybe it was the way her auburn locks flowed down her back, almost like a...
The Haybale
Nov 16, 2020


Bell Ringers Announce Every Song is the Glee Version
This past Saturday the Williams community was hit with a shocking and disgusting new development in the ever-changing profile of the...
Mati Rogers
Nov 15, 2020


Log Owner’s Mom Says he can Stay up 15 Minutes Later; Restaurant Now Open Until 8:15
Williams students are celebrating after local Spring Street favorite The Log has announced new extended hours on Saturdays. We visited...
Lizzie High
Nov 14, 2020


English Professor Cool Enough to Say Fuck
Last week, in English 204, “Yes, No, and Why Not?: Questions in Books” Professor Charles (Charlie) Hofstadt, shocked his students when he...
The Haybale
Nov 13, 2020


Male trustees uncomfortable with testing being conducted by “something called the Broads Institute"
As the College nears the end of a successful semester during a global pandemic, most administrators are enormously proud of their...
Sam Mermin
Nov 11, 2020


Unclear Where Skateboard Kid Going to Store Skateboard
The Williams Haystack has committed itself to investigative reporting, uncovering the hidden secrets of campus. From investigations into...
Lucy Walker
Nov 10, 2020


Report: Two Friends Appear to Be Wearing Masks but Passing a Lollipop Back and Forth
Frosh Quad was empty and quiet yesterday afternoon, save for two students walking across the grass. Both wore N-95 masks, goggles, hoods,...
The Haybale
Nov 9, 2020


COVID By the Numbers: Honeydew Consumption up 85%, Sex Down 48%
Student life at Williams has undergone dramatic changes this fall, so reporters at The Haystack sent out a survey to see just exactly how...
Max Stein
Nov 7, 2020


Op-Ed: I Have Never Eaten a Vegetable at Williams
Hi, Williams, it’s me, Jason. And I’m here to tell you about how I have never eaten a vegetable at Williams. First and foremost, I will...
Max Stein
Nov 5, 2020


PoliSci Major Announces Plan to Push Back on That, If He May
Capitalizing on a “lull” in the conversation characterized by three consecutive comments from people other than himself, Political...
Sam Mermin
Nov 2, 2020


The Haybale
Oct 31, 2020


The Haybale
Oct 31, 2020


The Haybale
Oct 31, 2020


Report: SAAC Inexplicably Does Not Plan to Change its Name
Williams College’s Student Athlete Advisory Committee announced today that it will not be changing its name. The official announcement...
The Haybale
Oct 29, 2020


How Am I Supposed to Pull Over Zoom When Everyone Can See My Unmade Bed
With so much of the college experience being relegated to an online space this semester, students are facing new and unprecedented...
Kevin Ryan
Oct 27, 2020


Unused Thompson Chapel to be converted into Spirit Halloween™
With the Halloween season approaching and the College strapped for cash because of the recent economic downturn, the administration has...
Lucy Walker
Oct 26, 2020


Breaking News: I Can't Fucking Do This Anymore
The investigation was first opened when it was discovered that I was just straight up leaving Zoom meetings in the middle because I didn’t w
Melia Hagino and Lucy Walker
Oct 26, 2020


Zig-Zagging Whitman’s Line Will Be Used for Sobriety Tests
Starting on Friday, October 23, CSS will begin conducting random sobriety tests on weekends to ensure student safety. With a large...
Asher Gladstone
Oct 24, 2020
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